3 Characteristics of a Godly Mother

In spite of the fact that I myself am still learning and working my way through this crazy maze called motherhood, I have been blessed with a Godly role model in the form of my own mother.  I want to share with you some characteristics of a Godly mother that I have observed in her life over the years.

1. She was the real deal.

One of the things that I couldn't help but notice even as a child, was that my mom was the same person in public as she was at home.  If there is any faster way to turn a child off to the things of the Lord it is to live a hypocritical lifestyle.  My mom did not do that, and although she wasn't perfect (no one is), she taught us how to love the Lord by backing up what she said with what she did both at home and in public. A godly mother knows who she is in Christ, and everything she does flows from that. She isn't trying to present a certain image of what she thinks a godly person should look like; she just lives out who she is – a masterpiece created in Christ Jesus for good works! (Ephesians 2:10)

2. She admitted when she had failed.

Every mother fails at motherhood, many times on a daily basis.  My mom had her moments of failure too.  But a moment of failure does not mean you should give up entirely.  “For a just man falleth seven times, and riseth up again…” (Prov. 24:16).  Instead of giving up when she fell short, or worse yet, pretending it didn't happen, she admitted her failure both to the Lord and to her children.  We knew that she desperately wanted us to love and obey God, and God was able to use her because of her humility.

God doesn't bless a perfect parent (because there is no such thing!), but he does bless a humble parent.

The humility of a godly mother takes place on two fronts:

1. Humility before God
2. Humility towards her children

A mother's humility before God recognizes her own weakness and her need to depend on the spirit of God each moment of the day. A humble mother keeps her focus on God, knowing that she cannot be a godly mother through her own strength and wisdom. She digs into scripture, nurturing her own spirit, knowing that she cannot pour from an empty vessel.
When a mother is humble toward God, there is also a willingness to confess to him when she has messed up and acted out of the flesh rather than the spirit. Mothering from the flesh could show up in different ways. It might look like yelling at our kids in a moment of frustration, or it might look like pridefully patting ourselves on the back after what felt like a successful day. Yet the most successful day in which a mother has operated without dependence on the holy spirit, is a failure to fulfill God's purpose. A godly mother will recognize these failures and confess to God the times when her life has not reflected the new, Christlike nature. She will turn from reflecting the flesh and renew her mind to reflect the spirit.

A mother's humility toward her children might look like apologizing when she has said hurtful words to them.
It might look like being honest with them about her weaknesses and being an example of how to depend on God. (“Mommy is feeling overwhelmed today. Can we pray together that God will help mommy to stay calm and speak kind words?”

3. She prayed – a LOT.

We children all knew mom spent time with the Lord daily.  We saw her spiritual journals and notes lying around and watched her read and study her Bible. And we knew she prayed.  Along with her journals and notes were her prayer lists.

My mother knew that the best place to wage the battle for her children's hearts was on her knees.

She knew that ultimately her children's lives were not within her control. She knew that each of her children was free to make their own choices. She knew that she was not in charge of the events that her children would encounter each day.

But she knew she had an audience with the One who is in control.

She brought her requests for her children to God, and left our lives in his hands.
She prayed for our safety and health.
She prayed that we would make wise, God-honoring decisions.
She prayed that God would bring godly spouses into our lives.

And while she fulfilled her responsibility to teach the scriptures to her children, she did not attempt to control the outcome of our lives. She allowed the Holy Spirit to do his own work in drawing our hearts to him, and let our choices be our own.

When she was tempted to worry and fear over our safety or our futures, she brought those fears to God and left them there.

So you see, mamas, the characteristics of a Godly mother aren't a standard of perfection. You don't have to be perfect to be a good mother.

It's much better to be a mother who:

• knows who she is in Christ and allows everything she does to flow from that
• humbly depends on God
• brings her fears for her child's welfare and future to the Lord and leaves them with Him

If you desire to see your children grow to love and obey the Lord; if you are the real deal, humble, and 100% dependent on the Lord to work in your children's hearts rather than trying to do the work yourself, you are on the right track.

Be encouraged.  When it seems your children aren't learning anything, just you wait.  They are watching.  And God is working.

Happy Lost Sock Day: Putting Lonely Socks to Useful Purposes

Guest post from Imperfect Homemaker contributor, Andrea.

Did you know that there was a holiday for missing socks?  Neither did I!  But let me tell you – I have lots of experience with missing socks!  My family does not have a washer and dryer in our urban apartment, so we utilize the laundry mat.  And nearly without fail, we come home with at least one mate-less sock.  I think this quote sums it up for me:

                “I have come to the conclusion that dryer lint is the cremated remains of all my missing socks.”

Or perhaps you can relate to this one:

Whatever the reason, I’m sure we all have some missing socks in our homes!  I always hate to throw away those perfectly good socks, just because their mate is M.I.A..  So what can we do to put lonely socks to useful purposes?  A quick search on Pinterest revealed many ideas.  Here is a list of the best ideas I found, and a few of my own ideas too!

Children:

• Make a Sock Fishing Game:  Basically, you stick a heavy duty magnet down in the toe of a baby/child’s sock, then stuff it (with paper, fabric, etc.).  Tie up the ends, decorate it, and you have an adorable homemade fishing game that the kids will love!  I made this with my kids and shared it on my blog here.
• Sock Puppets:  Put a few miscellaneous craft supplies to use and get creative with your kids making sock puppets!
• Foxtails:  You know – those balls with a tail?  Stick a tennis ball in a lonely tube sock, tie with a hair rubber band, and go play in the back yard!  If you want more information on Foxtails, check out this link.
• Baby Doll Socks: My daughter loves to dress her baby doll in real baby clothes – the ones left over from her siblings.  Give the mismatched baby socks to your kids to dress up their dolls or stuffed animals.  (As long as your child is not OCD about matching).
• Dog Toy: Not exactly for your kids, unless they like to play with the dog.  As a kid I used to tie knots in old socks to make a tug-o-war rope for the dogs.

Crafts:

You can make all kinds of crafts with lonely socks!  Here are a few ideas to get you started (and there are many variations on Pinterest!)

• Snowmen: I have these all around my house at Christmas time!
• Spiders
• Owls
• Kitties

Household:

• Bottle Sleeve: Use a lonely sock to insulate your water bottle in the summer.  It will absorb the “sweat” from your bottle and keep items in your bag/purse dry!
• Suitcase Organization:  My family is on deputation for missionary work right now, and we are doing a lot of traveling.  There are always tiny items getting lost in the abyss of the suitcase.  Use various sized lonely socks to organize everything from jewelry, to belts and accessories, to kids’ bow ties and hair bows.  I can’t wait to put this idea to use on our next trip!
• Dusting:  Slide a sock over your hand and dust away.  This would be especially helpful when using furniture polish.  I use Scotts Liquid Gold on my wood furniture, but I hate touching the rag and getting the oils all over my skin.  You could also make a reusable Swiffer-type duster out of old socks.
• Shoe Polishing: You can use mate-less socks to polish your shoes.  When they are worn out, toss them in the garbage and start over with another lonely sock!
• Shipping:  Use socks to pack valuables for shipping or moving.  You could place glasses and stemware into the sock itself, or use the socks to pack around items in a box.
• GPS/Electronic Protector: We do not leave our GPS in the windshield because it invites theft.  We have had our car window broken twice since moving to Brooklyn; in each case something electronic was the target.  One time we think they were looking for the GPS because the glove box had been emptied.  However, I stored my GPS in a cosmetic bag in the side door, and so the thief came up empty handed.  You could use a lonely sock to protect electronics such as your GPS, and “camouflage” them at the same time!
• Soap Exfoliator: Slide a bar of soap into a mate-less sock and wash the car, the bathtub, or even yourself.  The sock will exfoliate the soap suds!

My last tip comes from personal experience.  These are ideas are great for using those lonely socks.  But it may be better to prevent the missing sock epidemic from happening in the first place.  I throw all of my kids’ socks into a mesh laundry bag prior to heading to the laundry mat. 

I wash and dry them in the bag.  They are usually still damp after going through a dry cycle this way.  When I get home I spread them all over the dining room table to air dry overnight, and then I mate them and put them away in the morning.  It has been mostly successful for me thus far!

So go out and celebrate Lost Sock Day.  Make a craft.  Dust your house.  But if you can't find any of these ideas useful, then please throw away those mate-less socks and and at least be clutter free!

Apparoo App of the Week: iStoryTime

This post is sponsored by Apparoo.

I’ve partnered with Apparoo to highlight a new app each week. These apps will be free or highly discounted during the weeks I post them, so grab them while you can!

This week's app: iStoryTime

Sometimes simple is best. No matter how many fancy toys your kid has, they always end up on your lap saying “Mama, tell me a story.” iStoryTime is like a central library for kids’ books, and they wisely left off extraneous features, letting the stories shine. It includes four free books and then you can buy more à la carte, or pay a monthly or annual fee, Netflix-style, for unlimited books. With new books released in the app every week, there is always fresh content to enjoy. Stories can be narrated or silent, allowing your child to read independently when they’re ready. Download it here for free.

How I Plan My Menus with Build a Menu

We all know we should be planning our menus ahead, but actually doing it is quite another thing.

I recently found out about Build a Menu, and it is awesome!  It accommodates any diet type, like gluten free, Trim Healthy Mama, or even just “normal people”. 🙂

(Interested in trying it?  You can try it free for 2 weeks by going through this link!)

I thought I'd show you exactly how it works so you can make an informed decision.

1. Choose your store.

I love that it includes Aldi and Walmart!
I personally just choose “any grocery store” since I buy my food from a variety of places, including the farmer's market.

2.  Choose your recipes. You don't have to plan out 3 meals a day if you don't want to, but it's nice that everything is included if that's what you want to do.

There are so many dietary options from which to choose, and you are not limited to just one type.  You can mix and match as much as you want.
I love the choices, though!  (Dine on a Dime, Trim Healthy Mama, Gluten free, etc.)

You can open up the recipes and look at them to see if it is something your family would like.  You can also see approximately how much each recipe will cost to make, so you can skip the ones that don't fit your budget.  And if you're doing Trim Healthy Mama, it will tell you what type of meal it is (S, E, etc.) Then you mark the checkbox next to the ones you want to use and they are automatically added to your menu and the ingredients are added to your shopping list.

Another cool thing is that if you want to have something more than once, you can select how many times you want to have it, and the ingredients will be adjusted on your shopping list accordingly. (For example, it will tell you exactly how many ounces of beans you need to purchase.)

I also love the fact that the recipes are changed out every week so that there are not an overwhelming number of choices.  I am very easily overwhelmed, and when there's too much to look at I usually end up saying “forget it”.  You can, however, see all the menus you've created in the past, and if you want to add a favorite recipe to your menu for the week, you can do so even if it's not on the current week's list of recipes.

*New!  Now you can upload your own recipes too!*

3. After you select your recipes, you click “Build My Menu” and you'll be able to add your recipes to a calendar on the days you'd like to have them.  You can plan up to a month at a time; though you don't have to do that much.

You can also skip planning it out on the calendar and just go straight to printing your list of recipes and your shopping list.

(That's how I prefer to do it because I like to have the freedom to choose whichever meal I'm most in the mood for or whichever would work best with our schedule for the day.)

Oh, and I almost forgot to tell you – as you're checking off the recipes you want to use, the program is tallying up your grocery total for the week!  That's perfect for those of us trying to stay on a strict budget.

Here is what your shopping list will look like:

I love how it's divided up into sections of the store, and how it even lists staples so I can make sure I have enough of those things.

Now, I must say as a “real foodie”, there are certain ingredients that I skip, like canned soups, broths, etc.  But I've become pretty adept at substituting the “real food” versions of those things without any trouble.

So instead of buying broth at the store, I would just make sure I had enough homemade broth in the freezer or that I have enough yogurt to substitute for cream of ____ soup.   (Side note: yogurt works great for that in most cases – just add a little seasoning to it, and you've got a creamy/tasty substance with no need to go through the complicated steps of making homemade cream of ____ soup.)

That's pretty much it!

You can sign up for your subscription using the button below.

(But if you happen to not love it, there's a money-back guarantee, so it's totally risk free to give it a go.)

Note: I have included affiliate links within this post.  I will receive a portion of each purchase made through these links.  You pay nothing extra, but the commission helps keep Imperfect Homemaker up and running. (And it might put a couple groceries on our family table too – thanks!)

What it Means to Be a Yes Mom

Disclosure: This post is sponsored by Savings.com.

Being a “yes mom” doesn't mean letting your kids do whatever they want.  They need to understand that life doesn't revolve around them.  You don't need to feel guilty for not catering to your child's every whim.  That doesn't create happy children; that creates spoiled children.

But at the same time your children need to know that they are important to you — more important than what you want to get done in a day.  Sometimes we say no to our children just because it's more convenient to us.  Help me cook dinner?  No way.  I'll be done a whole lot faster if you just let me do it.  Read a book to you?  Not right now; I've got work to do.

Being a “yes mom” doesn't have to be complicated.

It's not about doing fancy crafts you found on Pinterest (though if you're up to it that's totally awesome.)

It's not about spending lots of money on whatever the latest gadget is that they want.

It's about letting them know by your actions that they are important.

Actions like going outside with them even when you'd rather get some housework done.

Like playing a goofy game they made up.  And then playing it again.  And again. And genuinely having fun, not because you really want to play the game but because you get to spend time with your kids.

Actions like letting your 6-year-old plant and water his “plant” even though he's probably going to need a bath.

And then letting him use the camera because he really wants to take a picture of his hard work.

It's about letting the kids sit up on the stool and watch me make dinner even though it drives me nuts to have people all up in my space while I'm trying to work.

Do you truly believe that your kids are important?  That they are human beings who just happen to live in tiny bodies right now?

How can you show them that they are important?

I'd love for you to use the hashtag #YesMomDay to share your “yes mom” moments on social media!

Tools for Homemaking Productivity

I struggle with keeping things clean and orderly.  My brain is constantly bursting with ideas, and I tend to be a little “ADDish”, flitting from one thing to the next and making a bunch of messes as I go.

(I named this blog Imperfect Homemaker for a reason!)

Anything to help my days be a little more productive is a big plus!

Here are some of the tools I use on a daily basis to help me have a little more accomplishment to show at the end of the day:

1. Clothes. 

That would be as opposed to PJ's or loungewear.  You'll get more done when you wear real clothes, I promise.  When you wear PJ's or loungewear all day, you just feel like…well…lounging.  Not good for productivity.  (If you need some clothes at a good price, you should check out Thredup.  It's like an online thrift store, which is great for this busy mom who doesn't have time to drag her kids to a real thrift store.  Plus, you get a free $10 credit to spend when you sign up through my referral link here.)

2. Shoes.

Not just any shoes.  Sneakers. (I actually grew up calling them tennis shoes.  What do you call them?  Oh, wait.  I'm getting distracted again.  Back to the point.)

If you put shoes on your feet, it helps you walk faster and get things done more quickly.  Plus you don't ever have to stop and clean crumbs out of your toes or nurse a throbbing foot because you stepped on a lego.

Your shoes should be ultra-comfortable so that you can wear them all day long.  I have these, and they have been one of the best purchases I've ever made.  These are the most comfortable shoes for all-day wear I've ever owned.

3. Music

Listening to fast-paced music helps keep me going.  And it's nice to have Christ-honoring music to think about as I work too.  Old Christian Radio plays a lot of faster-paced music, and many of the songs on the CD that my husband and I recorded are fast-paced as well.

4. Rags and cleaners

Keeping rags and a bottle of cleaner in multiple places throughout the house makes my job a lot easier.  Whenever someone spills something or makes a potty-training mess on the bathroom floor, I have what I need right at hand to clean it up immediately.  I use my homemade non-toxic disinfectant as an all-purpose cleaner.  It works so well for just about everything.

5. Air fresheners

There is something about things smelling clean that makes me want to keep things clean.

I'm sure this makes me a healthy living heretic, but I absolutely LOVE the smell of Downy Unstopables.  When I'm walking through the laundry room I just want to stay there because it smells so good!  (Does anyone know of a natural way to make the laundry smell that good?  I hate using the chemicals on my clothes, and I try not to do it terribly often, but it just smells oh-so-good!  And no, adding lavender drops to the wash is not a valid suggestion.  It's fine, but just not the blow-me-away awesome smell that the Downy is.  If you're awesome with essential oils and you have a recipe that you think will blow me away, I'd love for you to share!)

6. A Menu Plan

There is something about knowing at the beginning of the day what I am having for dinner that makes the entire day go more smoothly.

Sometimes I drop the ball and end up scrambling at dinner time.  Not fun.  But even more often than that, I get in a rut with meals.  We end up having the same things over and over because I am just too tired to try to think of interesting meals.

I just discovered the coolest menu planning program.  Really, really cool.

It's called Build a Menu.  You choose the store where you normally shop, and then you're given recipe options for all different eating styles (for example: Clean Eating, Gluten Free, Budget Friendly, even Trim Healthy Mama!)

If you want to see exactly how it looks in action, take a look at this post.

The thing that makes Build a Menu so cool is that you get to decide what you want to make.  Many menu planners give you a pre-made menu, but then it ends up being nothing that you or your family would like.  With this you simply look through the recipes (breakfast, lunch, dinner, snacks, and desserts are all included!) and mark the checkboxes beside the ones you want to have that week.  Boom!  Your menu and shopping list are done, and it's exactly what you want to eat!

Which of these tools do you need to start using?  What would you add to this list that helps you be more productive at home?