5 Things I Learned About Homemaking from my Grandmothers

When I think about my grandmothers, my mind is filled with happy memories and with gratitude for the godly influence they both have been to me.  One grandmother is in heaven and one is still with us. I just got to see her a few days ago.

As I thought about the blessing it was to grow up with grandparents who loved the Lord, I immediately thought of several very specific ways my homemaking has been influenced from watching the lives of my grandmothers.

1. I learned from my grandmothers to pray about everything.

Many were the times my parents would receive a call from a grandparent asking everyone to “Please pray for _____.” And my parents would immediately gather all of us children around to pray.

When I was growing up we lived near my dad's parents, and I got to spend a lot of time with his mom (my Granny.) Many of my Saturdays were spent riding around in the back of her car as we scouted out yard sales. I don't ever remember a time when I rode with her that she did not pray before we left the driveway for protection as we drove. My parents usually did the same, and now with my own children I almost always stop to pray before we leave the driveway.

I did not get to spend time with my mom's mother (My Grammy) as often since she lived far away from us, but I still have letters and cards from her that I treasure. She always let me know in her letters that she prayed for me, and though I would not have been able to put it into words at the time, I knew that I was extremely blessed to have a grandmother who loved me so much and spent her time praying for me.

                       Me and my Grammy

Now that I am a wife and mom, I try to set an example to my own children to pray about everything. I spend time in private prayer and I also spend time praying with my children. There is no better way for them to learn that God answers prayer than to learn to pray themselves.

2. I learned from my grandmothers to praise the Lord for everything.

While it's important to pray, it's just as important to praise God when he answers prayers. When we cry out to God in the midst of some crisis, it's easy to forget about it once the crisis is over.

I have heard my grandmothers praise God out loud many times. They set an example for me to remember that everything I have is from God, and I want to do the same for my children.

3. I learned from my grandmothers to love children.

We all have different personalities, just as my two grandmothers did. My Granny was always on the go (and still is!) The more kids she had around her, the happier she was. My Grammy was more quiet and subdued, and although I would have been too young to perceive it, I imagine her nervous system was not wired to tolerate as much noise and rowdiness. (Now that I'm a mom with constant noise in the house, I understand this perfectly!)

However, regardless of their personalities, they both heartily embraced their role as grandmother and counted it a privilege to be involved in the lives of their grandchildren.

I know that children are a blessing, and I choose to be thankful for them even on the days where I'm feeling overwhelmed.

                                    My Granny

4. I learned from my grandmothers that messes are okay.

I can remember my  Granny quoting on more than one occasion, “Where no oxen are, the crib is clean,” meaning that she was perfectly okay with the mess in her house as long as it meant the children she loved were there to make the messes.

Looking back I can tell that my Grammy was the kind of person who needed things to be neat and orderly, but at the same time she understood that messes come with the territory of loving children. She never seemed to get frustrated when we made a mess, but she gently and kindly taught us how to help clean up after ourselves. I remember learning how to hand wash dishes at her house, and although I have had the opportunity to use a dishwasher almost my entire life, I still think of her gentle teaching every time I hand wash my dishes.

I've learned that I can both be okay with the mess and I can also gently teach my children how to live neatly.

5. I learned from my grandmothers that it is more blessed to give than to receive.

Although as a child I didn't understand the importance of the things I was observing about my grandmothers, they were making an impact on me nonetheless.

I watched them serve their families, and I watched them serve people in their communities.

I never saw them be lazy and I never heard them complain. They did what they did because they loved people.

It is obvious that both of my grandmothers took seriously their responsibility to set an example for their grandchildren and to help guide them in the path of righteousness.
Their lives impacted me both through my direct interactions with them and indirectly through the things my parents learned from them.

And now my own parents (and my husband's parents) in turn take their responsibility as grandparents seriously to set an example for my children.

                                                                                              My mom and her grandkids

What a heritage I have! What a blessing to have had the opportunity not just to learn these things from my grandmothers through words, but to see that their words were backed up by their actions.

When the time comes, if I am still on this earth, I hope that I can be the kind of influence on my granddaughters that my grandmothers were to me. I hope I can teach them to love their families, to be thankful for them, and to depend on God for their strength each day.

Homemaking Update: August 2020

Blogging has really changed a lot over the years. I used to write a blog post several times a week if not daily. Years ago a blog post was nothing fancy; it was just an online record of what you were up to or what you were thinking about.

As things have become more and more complicated in the world of online content creation, I thought it would be a breath of fresh air just to write an old fashioned blog post with a life update.

So here I go with an update about what  I did in August:

Continued working in my garden.
I've been bringing in several varieties of beans each day, along with some cherry tomatoes that are still producing. I also cleaned out plants that were finished and replanted some fall crops.

I finished 3 books in August:

1. Elizabeth Prentiss: More Love to Thee

My review on Goodreads:

2. Cozy Minimalist Home

I've seen this book recommended several places, so since I happen to be in the process of updating my living room I took a quick skim through the book. I resonated with everything this author said, and learned a couple tips along the way.

Favorite quotes:

“I like pretty things, but not so much that they're allowed to make my life more complicated.”

“You're not a Stuff Manager, you're a Home Curator.”

I read this book using the Scribd app on my phone. I did a free Scribd trial three years ago, and I have kept my subscription ever since. It is one of the very few “extras” I splurge on, and it is worth every penny! Nearly every book I see recommended is on there, and I can read anything I desire without cluttering my home with more books. (Use my link here for a free 60 day trial. Normally the free trial is only 30 days, but you get an extra month using my link. Cancelling is super easy if you decide it's not for you.)

3. Unseen: The Gift of Being Hidden in a World that Loves to Be Noticed

My review on Goodreads:

“I just finished this book, and I want to turn right back around and read it again! This book pointed my thoughts to my Father so persistently. There is nothing so fulfilling, so life-giving as to “waste time” with Him.”

Favorite quotes:

“Too often we settle for lesser things. It seems easier to get a like online than it does to get quiet before God, to seek His face and listen for His whispers.”

“There are two stories in every person – the visible story and the invisible story.”

“The moments that the world doesn't witness are always his to see.”

“Hiddenness is God's way of helping us with this holy detachment, slowly releasing our clutch on the things of the earth which we were never intended to grip.”

I listened to the audio version of this book using my Scribd app. (Use this link for a 60 day free trial.)

If you prefer a hard copy, Book Outlet currently has this book for less than half what it costs on Amazon. You'll just have to check; it's always hit or miss what Book Outlet has in stock. (Create your account using this link and you'll get a credit for $10 off your first order of $25+.)

Here's a fantastic article I read and shared to Facebook recently:

A Letter to Wives Who Are Wondering: Is it Abuse?

I have a heart for women who are hurting in their marriage, whether that is because of misunderstandings and miscommunication or because of abuse or betrayal. If you need additional resources, feel free to reach out to me in an email (imperfecthomemaker@gmail.com.)

Meat and produce delivered to my door:

I continued to receive produce boxes from Misfits Market (although I reduced the frequency at which I received them since I was also bringing in produce from the garden.) If you haven't seen my thorough review of Misfits Market produce boxes, you can read it here.

I also got another huge box of grassfed/pasture raised meat from ButcherBox. I wrote a step by step plan here for how to get the best deal on a ButcherBox subscription.

What God has been teaching me this month:

A common theme has emerged this month in my personal Bible study, during worship with other believers, and through things I read and listen to. The theme has been to trust God to write the story of my days. Even when I do not understand the big picture, I can trust that He does, and that He is working all things together for good.

So when we lose our only (expensive) key to the van, I can trust that he knows why it disappeared into thin air and why we needed to purchase another.

When our washing machine breaks and the easy fix my husband thought it would be turns out not to be so easy, I can trust God even when it feels like we're wasting a lot of time and money.

God's ways won't always make sense to me because I don't know the bigger story. Faith is being okay with not knowing. It's being satisfied with knowing that God knows what He's doing.

And now looking forward to September, here are a few of the things I hope to accomplish:

Drinking more water

I feel I have been chronically dehydrated lately, and I really want to focus on getting in a good 64 oz. of water each day to see if it improves my energy and focus.

Trying a new clothing subscription

I have used StitchFix for several years, and still like it a lot. Now I'm trying a new service called Wantable. I really enjoy having clothing that helps me feel put together, and using a styling service saves me a lot of time shopping. I thought maybe with trying something besides StitchFix it might add to the variety of my wardrobe a bit. (Want to give it a try? Here's my referral link.)

Plan to Read:
Is it Abuse? by Darby Strickland.

As a domestic abuse advocate, I am always previewing books that I think will be helpful for both victims and for those who want to help a friend or loved one who may be a victim.  You can pre-order a copy of this book here.
(Get a $5 off coupon if you go through this link first..)

I'm hoping to do a little freezer cooking this month.

I've been putting all my extra time and energy into the garden this summer, so I'm excited to get back into freezer cooking a bit.

Sourdough starter?

This one is a maybe. It's something I've been wanting to do for a long time, but there are only so many hours in the day. I'm hoping I can fit this in!

Well that was fun! If you want to see even more, you can follow me on Instagram. Thanks for following along!

10 Ways to Pray When the World is Upside Down

This is such an interesting time in our world. To have a common interest with every other human on earth is a strange feeling isn’t it? Whether you’re concerned about how the virus itself may affect you or your family, wary of what opportunities your government might take right now to remove some of your freedoms, or unsure of what the economic ramifications will be for your family , we’re all experiencing some form of uncertainty as a result of this virus.

But the truth is, virus or no virus, the same God who has always been in control is still in control right now. If nothing else, I hope this virus reminds us of that and causes us to turn our hearts to a greater dependence on the Lord.

For me personally, I’ve had to re-evaluate how much time I spend in prayer compared to how much time I spend trying to come up with my own solutions to the world’s problems. (As if that’s going to do any good anyway!)

I hope you’ll join me in praying for our world rather than overthinking everything that’s going on. I’ve collected a list of specific ways you can pray during this pandemic.

1. Pray for government leaders to have wisdom in making decisions for those under their leadership.

I Timothy 2:1-2 I exhort therefore, that, first of all, supplications, prayers, intercessions, and giving of thanks, be made for all men; For kings, and for all that are in authority; that we may lead a quiet and peaceable life in all godliness and honesty.

2. Pray for the health of your loved ones and for the healthcare workers who are caring for the sick.

James 5:14-16 Is any sick among you? let him call for the elders of the church; and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord: And the prayer of faith shall save the sick, and the Lord shall raise him up; and if he have committed sins, they shall be forgiven him. Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.

3. Pray that the Gospel would be spread to a dying world. 

I Peter 4:7 But the end of all things is at hand: be ye therefore sober, and watch unto prayer.

4. Pray for persecuted Christians around the world. Many have been freed from prison as a result of the virus, while others are facing even greater difficulties than they had previously.

Hebrews 13:3 Remember them that are in bonds, as bound with them; and them which suffer adversity, as being yourselves also in the body.

5. Pray for victims of spousal and child abuse. For many, staying home for weeks on end with an abusive parent or spouse will be psychologically and physically damaging without the reprieve of work or school.

Proverbs 31:8-9  Open thy mouth for the dumb in the cause of all such as are appointed to destruction.Open thy mouth, judge righteously, and plead the cause of the poor and needy.

6. Pray for the emotional needs people will have during times of isolation, especially those who will be cut off from family.

Psalm 147:3 He healeth the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds.

7. Pray that God would comfort those who have lost loved ones and give peace to those who have ill family members. 

Philippians 4:7 And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

8. Pray for God’s provision during a time of economic hardship

Psalm 37:25 I have been young, and now am old; yet have I not seen the righteous forsaken, nor his seed begging bread.

9. Pray for revival in the church. Pray that believers would exhibit unity and love to one another, that our hearts would be alerted to the urgency to spread the gospel, that God would increase our faith in Him.

Ephesians 5:15-19 See then that ye walk circumspectly, not as fools, but as wise, Redeeming the time, because the days are evil. Wherefore be ye not unwise, but understanding what the will of the Lord is.  And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit; Speaking to yourselves in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord;

1o. Pray that God would give you personal opportunities to show His love to others during this time.

Galatians 6:10 As we have therefore opportunity, let us do good unto all men, especially unto them who are of the household of faith.

Matthew 5:14-16 Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on an hill cannot be hid. Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.

Feel free to share the below image on social media:

A Disease Much Worse than Coronavirus

There is a disease that is more deadly than any disease the earth has ever known. It has killed more people than every virus combined, and yet I rarely hear it spoken of. The news media regularly updates the public on the latest Coronavirus statistics, and the virus has become a part of our conversations with friends, family, and strangers at the grocery store. And yet, the most deadly disease of all receives little of our attention.

The symptoms of this disease are varied and horrifying. They include but are not limited to:

• Hatred of other people, even to the point of murder
• The desire to lie, steal, and commit adultery
• Children infected with this disease may bully other children, lie to their parents, and display rebelliousness toward their parents’ instruction.

Some people display extremely mild symptoms, which makes it easy to ignore this disease. But if left untreated, everyone affected, no matter how mild their symptoms appear to be, will die.

Every human on earth is infected with this disease. It is passed from the parents to every child ever born, and it has been this way since the birth of the first children on earth.

Many treatment options have been tried, but all fail except for one. The mortality rate of this disease, no matter what treatment is applied, is 100%. But when the one successful treatment is applied, 100% of those who receive it not only live, but they live forever.

I’m sure you’ve figured out by now that the disease I’m referring to is sin. We are all infected with it. (1)  It causes all manner of death and destruction here on earth, and for those who do not receive the only Cure, it results in eternal death. (2)

Many do not pay any heed to the seriousness of this disease because they do not seem to be affected in such terrible ways as others. They have never been driven to murder, steal, or commit adultery, and so they fail to recognize that even the less obvious symptoms like pride, covetousness, or using God’s name in vain are still sin and still will result in eternal death. (3)

Many try to cure this disease themselves by “turning over a new leaf,” by spending time with others who have been cured and assuming the cure will apply to them too, or by assuming that their symptoms have not been bad enough to warrant death. (4)

But the truth is that there is only one cure for this disease, and that is to be cleansed from its filthiness. Complete cleansing only comes when one is washed in the blood of Jesus Christ, the Lamb of God. (5)

Everyone who will be washed, will be made clean and will be cured from this disease.  (6)

The disease of sin has left death and destruction in its wake all around the world. Even the diseases about which we are currently so concerned are a result of sin’s influence on this earth.

People are rushing to prepare themselves for the possibility of the Coronavirus hitting their area. Where is the rush to prepare for the coming judgment of God?

Courageous doctors and nurses risk their health to care for those infected with deadly diseases around the world. Do we have the same concern for those who are infected with the disease of sin?

As a domestic violence advocate, I see and hear about the horrific effects of sin on a regular basis. I see the cruelty that a sinful heart is willing to inflict upon another human being. I’m all for the law holding accountable anyone who would harm another person in any way. But I also realize that better laws and accountability will not ultimately stop hatred, abuse, assault, and murder. Those things come from the heart, and while a perpetrator may sit behind bars, if his heart is not cleansed from its filthiness he will never change.

The only hope for abusers and their victims is the Gospel. The only hope for thieves and their victims is the Gospel. The only hope for liars and their victims is the Gospel. The only hope for any of us is the Gospel!

Should we acknowledge and prepare for worldwide diseases? Should we take action on behalf of the 6 women who are killed by a partner or family member every single hour? Should we insist that people who would sexually assault another individual be removed from the streets?

Absolutely, yes! But the root of all these terrible things is sin, and the only remedy is Jesus! Through him, murderers, pedophiles, thieves and liars can be cleansed from their filthiness. Through him, people who are moral but can never attain the standard of perfection God requires can be cleansed from their sin. In him, the victims of heinous crimes and abuses can find unconditional, healing love.

So while we speak of diseases, crimes, and abuses and brainstorm solutions to these problems, let us not forget to speak of Jesus. Let us not lose Him in the midst of these important conversations, for He is the most important solution of all.

(1) Romans 3:23 For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;

Romans 3:10-12 As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one:There is none that understandeth, there is none that seeketh after God. They are all gone out of the way, they are together become unprofitable; there is none that doeth good, no, not one.

(2) John 3:18-19 He that believeth on him is not condemned: but he that believeth not is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God. And this is the condemnation, that light is come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil.

(3) James 2:10 For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all.

(4) Isaiah 64:6 But we are all as an unclean thing, and all our righteousnesses are as filthy rags; and we all do fade as a leaf; and our iniquities, like the wind, have taken us away.

(5) John 1:29 The next day John seeth Jesus coming unto him, and saith, Behold the Lamb of God, which taketh away the sin of the world.

(6) John 11:25-26 Jesus said unto her, I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live:And whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die. Believest thou this?

How to Get the Best Deal on a Butcherbox Subscription

Last year I tried out Butcherbox, and while I was extremely happy with the quality of the meat (it's all grass fed and pasture raised meat) I wasn't sure if our budget could afford to continue the subscription.

However, since I was personally trying to stick to a Trim Healthy Mama plan and needed lean meat, I decided that I would keep my subscription just so I could get high quality chicken tenders for myself. Call me a snob, but I just can't bring myself to eat conventionally raised chicken on a regular basis. I do the majority of my shopping at Aldi, and the only decent meat they have available is their grass fed beef. I needed the chicken for THM so I decided to keep my Butcherbox subscription just for that even though it was an extra cost.

Fast forward about 6 months and what I've discovered is that it's much cheaper to buy from Butcherbox than I originally expected; it just takes a little bit of planning and strategy!

So without further adieu, here is the strategy I use to purchase all our Butcherbox meat for around $5/lb.  (Just for reference, the grass fed beef at my Aldi is $5.29  per pound, and I don't even have anywhere to purchase any other good meat, so it's been super nice to get all manner of meats for less than what I would pay for boring old ground beef.)

Here is my step by step strategy to get the best deal on a Butcherbox subscription.

1. I purchase the custom box for $169/month. This gets you the most meat for the money because you can choose which cuts
of meat you want in your box. (You get to choose 6 selections to go in your box.) Naturally, since we're trying to cut our costs down as low as possible, I choose the cuts which give me the most meat, which would be chicken tenders or breasts, or boneless pork butt.
This gets you between 18 and 21 pounds of meat – 18 if you buy all chicken, 21 if you buy all pork.
(Tip: if you buy the pork butt you'll want to slow cook it. The ones I have purchased have been a little bit tough, but slow cooking helps a lot. The chicken, however, has been amazing!)

You may be tempted to go with the offer of a bigger box which includes 18-26 pounds, making the price per pound a little bit cheaper; however if you follow my strategy I can get you a better deal, so keep reading!

So far your total cost is somewhere between 7 and 8 dollars a pound, which is not horrible if you're a chicken snob like me, but we can do better!

2. If this is your first time subscribing, you can sign up through my referral link, which will either give you money off your first box or some free product, which will bring the price per pound down even more.

3. You'll be prompted to select add-on products, which may or may not be a good deal. You'll just have to look. I've been able to get sausage and chicken breasts for $6/lb. when I purchase them as an add-on which is pretty good.

4. For your first box, you'll have to be satisfied with the deal you just got. Between the free products or referral credit you get when you go through my link, and any good prices you found in the add-ons section, you should have gotten a decent deal.

Now, once you've got your account set up and you've paid for your first box, we're going to get you some even better deals for your next box. Ready? Keep reading!

5. Set your subscription time to the max allowed between boxes which is 8 weeks.

6. Now, this is where the real magic happens! While you're waiting for your next box to arrive, you'll want to keep a careful eye on your inbox. Every time you get a sale email from Butcherbox, you need to open it!

They'll send you a link to a page full of deals.

7. When you see a deal that you like, go ahead and add it to your cart. You can add multiples of the same deal to your cart. It's kind of like going to the grocery store and finding something on clearance. I don't know about you, but I buy as many as I can as long as I have space in my freezer. Spending extra now will save me a heap of money later.

8. After you add your deals to your cart, they will stay in your cart until your next box is billed, even if the deals are no longer showing as available when your box bills. That is why it is so advantageous to add things to your cart right anytime you see a price you like.

9. Do not delete any of the specials from your cart unless you are 100% certain you do not want them. If you delete them and they are not available on the deals page anymore, there will be no way to put them back into your cart.

10. Keeping your subscription set to 8 weeks between billing periods gives you a good amount of time to watch for deals. However, my experience has been that I find enough hot deals during that time to last our family even more than 8 weeks. If you don't yet need another box and your billing date is approaching, you can go in and delay your shipment until whatever date you choose. Click on “Update” where it shows your next billing date and then choose your new date.

11. This will give you even more time to check for sales before your next box bills too.  I just continue to delay my box indefinitely until my freezer tells me it's time to restock. Then I look at my list of deals and double check that I've got all the best prices in my cart and select a billing/shipping date that works for me.

Some weeks the deals will be better than others, for instance if there are holidays they might have some really good specials. Just keep checking and adding anything you think you might want each week. You can always delete the higher priced things later if you find something even cheaper.

12. In the mean time, while I'm waiting for weeks, usually 3-4 months, I set aside extra cash from my grocery budget each month so that when I purchase a big bulk order I will have something to pay for it with.

My most recent order was $380. By the time I juggled the sales around in my cart, I ended up paying a little less than $5 per pound for all of this meat.

Now, I must say that I go for cheaper cuts of meat in order to be as economical as possible. If I were adding filet mignon to  my cart every time I obviously wouldn't be able to get my order that low of a price per pound. However, I'm very satisfied with the variety of meats that I'm able to keep in my freezer for my family. We eat ground beef, boneless chicken, bone-in chicken (which gives me broth as well,) pork roasts, bacon, sausage, and turkey.

Between our Butcherbox subscription and my Misfits Market subscription, I always have high-quality meat and produce in the house, which makes up the bulk of my grocery list each week. We're eating lots of protein and vegetables rather than empty carbs, and we all feel more clear headed and energetic when that's the biggest part of our diet. In spite of being a “food snob”, and only purchasing organic produce and high-quality, pasture raised meat, we are able to keep our food costs to $700 per month or less, including toiletries and household items.

I love keeping my freezer full, which saves me trips to the store, and makes it easy for me to always be able to find something to prepare a meal for my family.

If you'd like to try a Butcherbox subscription, you can use this link to get the referral credit and current sign-up offer, then follow the steps I've outlined above to continue getting the best possible price on high quality meat!

10 Boundaries You Can Set to Stop Wasting Time on Social Media

By far, one of the biggest time wasters for me can be my phone, most specifically social media. Once you get on it, you can keep scrolling until the end of time and never run out of interesting things to look at.

Sometimes you can hop on with the best intentions (“I just need to look something up”; “Just a quick scroll to see how my friends are doing”; etc.) and find yourself still scrolling an hour later.

Usually the result is that you feel guilty for wasting time, and frustrated because you were so determined not to fall down the black hole again, yet you did anyway.

How does this happen?

While I won't go into all the technical details, it is proven science that social media apps take advantage of the same process in your brain that creates any other addiction. This is done intentionally because these platforms rely on advertising; therefore it is part of their business strategy to keep you on their platform as often and as long as possible. Negative feelings on social media actually contribute to the addiction as your brain builds up anticipation for the next positive feeling that will hit.

It's not that you have no self-discipline when you open up social media; it's that your brain is doing exactly what it is wired to do, and that is to stay mesmerized, continuously scrolling in anticipation of the next dopamine hit.

Depending on your genetics, your nutrition, and several other factors, this process will take place in some people's brains more quickly than in others.
So what can you do when you want to use your smartphone for good things but you keep getting sucked into wasting a bunch of time?

You can set boundaries for yourself that allow you to stay connected to your friends and family without enabling you to become entranced in an endless scroll.

Here are a 10 ideas for boundaries that you can set for yourself on social media:

1. Practice mindfulness
Fully engage your brain. Don't use your phone as a way to mindlessly escape from the pressures of the day. I get it. When you feel tired or stressed, you just want to check out for a few minutes watching some cute cat videos. But using these apps mindlessly is the quickest way to get sucked in and lose track of time.

2. Follow with intention
When your feed is cluttered with all manner of shiny things, it only contributes to the tendency your brain has to be anticipating that next dopamine hit. But when the people and pages you're following are on your feed for a specific reason, it's easier to keep your brain engaged.
Ask yourself:
-Am I learning anything or being encouraged to grow as a person by what this person shares?
-Are the updates I receive from this person truly helping me keep up with how they're doing or do they only share dorky memes?
-Am I angered or irritated by the things this person shares?

Unfollow anything that is not helping you grow as a person or keep in touch with the people you care about. Unfollow things that make you feel irritated and angry. Unfollow things that are simply shiny “fluff”.

3. Move apps from your phone's home page
Sometimes it just becomes a habit to open up your apps, even when you have no particular reason to. Moving them to a more obscure location on your phone will cause you to put in a little more effort to open them and hopefully think a little harder about why you're opening them.

4. Turn off social media notifications
Seeing those little numbers beside your icons or feeling your phone vibrate in your pocket is a trigger for you to immediately open up your app. There is no mindfulness involved which is a dangerous place for your brain when you're on an app specifically designed to suck you into its content.

5. Leave your phone off your body
Having your phone in your pocket can get you into the habit of mindlessly pulling it out all the time.

6. Replace checking your phone with a different action
Every time you pull out your phone and start to mindlessly open an app, start replacing it with a different action. Do a few squats, write a few lines in your journal, or read a chapter of a book.

7. Go on a social media fast
Choose a day, weekend, or week and go completely screen free except for necessary phone calls or texts. This will give your brain a chance to reset from mindless habits.

8. Use an app to restrict your social media usage to certain times of day
I use the AntiSocial app  on my Android. I'm sure there are similar apps for iPhone. It gives me a lot of options for choosing which apps to restrict and when to restrict them. I asked my husband to set the password for the restrictions so that I can't cheat and log myself back in.

9. Give yourself permission to use social media at the right times
Don't view social media as the forbidden fruit, which only draws you to it more strongly. View it as the valuable tool that it is, and use it with intention. Using an app to restrict my usage has helped me be much more mindful and intentional when I do get on. I know that I only have a certain amount of time, so I'm careful to prioritize looking at and commenting on the content that is truly important for me to see.

10. Remove apps from your phone
If necessary, remove the temptation completely by getting rid of your apps altogether. If you do this, you might want to ask someone else to set a password on your phone for adding and deleting apps so that you won't be able to download them again.

There is no reason to feel guilty about using social media. It can be a very valuable, worthwhile thing when used with intention. I hope these boundaries will help you use your time wisely!

Social media isn't the only aspect of online life that can eat our time away. The good news is that with intention, there is a whole lot we can do to ensure we are accomplishing more with our time.